If you thought being a new mom meant kissing goodbye ‘me time’ for the next 18 years, think again. Sure, it’s a lot harder to find time for yourself when you have a newborn, but it’s not impossible. You just can’t impulsively indulge as much, which means planning self care becomes paramount. Here are some ways to find some ‘me time’ and relax as a new mom.
Relaxing as a new mom 101
First, it starts with giving yourself permission to be the center of your world for a few minutes a day. It’s not selfish, it’s necessary. Ultimately, if you can give yourself a few minutes of self care a day, it can help with the feelings of irritability and frustration that most new moms experience.
Yeah fine…but how?
Determine what ‘me-time’ really means to you. Be honest with yourself about what actually makes you feel energized or relaxed. What drops your shoulders and allows your eyes to rest. And think about how you can get the most bang for your buck.
For example, as a new mom, you probably can’t just sit back with a glass of wine and enjoy a fav full length movie uninterrupted. But you *can* put on some relaxing ASMR (if that’s your thing) while you have a quick pee.
You might not be able to go out for a girl’s night, but you *can* take a quick break to have a dance party with your fav high school jam. (For me, that’s the Cool Summer Mellow Mix of Vibin’ by Boyz II Men or Feelin’ It by Jay-Z.)
So think about little ways you can slip some self-care and relaxation into your day. Self care is not an all or nothing thing. Treat yourself where and when you can.
Involve your senses
Your new relaxing moment might be a quiet cup of hot tea or a milkshake after your newborn goes down for the night (even if ‘the night’ is just a few hours). Focus on your senses, make it feel special, and get yourself a Mom Mug or a Mom Tumbler.
Truth is, the more you involve your senses, the better the moment. And you don’t have to limit this kind of self care to when the baby’s napping or sleeping…
Want to feel like a free goddess who spends her days at the spa, even though you’re covered in spit up and have one boob hanging out of your shirt at all times? Slice up some cucumber, strawberries, or lemons and throw them in your water. Hydration is key to staying healthy and happy, and spicing up your H2O game with some fruit is sure to give you a boost of fancy fun.
Tackle your lists
Grab two note pads and make two lists: New Mom Brain Dump + I Need Help.
New Mom Brain Dump – This should stay in your diaper bag, in your kitchen, on your nightstand, or wherever it’ll be most convenient, because this is the list where all your ‘I need to remember to’ and “Oh, I should write that down’ things go. Don’t worry about prioritizing these things, just get them out of your brain space. Find a minute each day or week to turn the Brain Dump into a ‘To Do’ list, and get that nice rush of success as you cross everything off.
I Need Help – Listen…it is HARD to ask for help sometimes, especially as a new mom. We’re supposed to be able to handle it all, right? Actually, that’s not possible. So, list out all the things you’d love help with – from cleaning the kitchen and doing laundry to putting gas in the car, taking the trash out, bathing the dogs, etc. Nothing is too small! Every little minute of help you get frees you up to shower, soak up the baby giggles, or just have a moment to yourself.
You may even wanna jot these things down in your Strong Mama Journal or add them to your checklist on this Hustlin Mama Note Pad.
Breathe in the happy
While many moms recommend taking naps while baby is resting, realistically this isn’t always possible. So, if you find yourself in the ‘can’t nap when baby’s napping’ category, use nap time to do something that makes you happy.
Whether it’s taking a hot bath or reading a magazine, these little things can help restore a sense of normalcy and bring some relaxation into your days. Psst…a nice bath bomb or bath soak can make your self care break even more relaxing.
‘Me time’ might even sometimes come as a surprise, so be present and enjoy the quiet moments as they come. If your little one falls asleep in your arms after 45 minutes of rocking, and suddenly, all you can hear are the crickets chirping outside, enjoy it. During chaotic times or moments of frustration, these memories will serve as doses of calm and reassurance that remind you it’s all going to be okay.
Lastly, in case you need some permission or a reminder: Putting the needs of your emotional health first will not interfere with your ability to provide your child proper care. In fact, the more attention you can give yourself, the more energized and positive you’ll feel as a result. And ultimately, if your cup is full (or at least not bordering on empty all the time), you’ll be better able to give to others. It’s a win-win.