Ah, pregnancy … you’re glowing, your mini-me is growing in your belly like a weed and everyone has something to say about it. We know how it is, when you’re out minding your own business and a stranger comes up with all kinds of thoughts to share. We’ve rounded up our top list of what NOT to say to a pregnant woman … and what to say instead.
“You’re HUGE!”
Okay, how is this not a no-brainer? Don’t tell an expecting mom she’s huge–you may as well call her fat. No one wants to hear that anytime, much less when pregnant. She’s growing a tiny human, and it’s one of the most beautiful stages of life.
Try: “You look radiant!”
“You sure it’s just one?”
See above. With all the technology in monitoring, you can bet that mama’s known since her first ultrasound that it was “just one.” Again, you may as well call her fat. Sorry friends, this joke isn’t funny.
Try: “You look beautiful!”
“You think you’re not sleeping NOW … ”
We get it–babies don’t sleep! But it certainly doesn’t make that 3rd trimester insomnia any easier right now. Instead of focusing on the negatives, try to shed some light at the end of the tunnel.
Try: “Hang in there–it’s only temporary!”
“Are you planning on breastfeeding? / Will you go back to work? / Are you having another?”
And any other overly personal question … don’t ask. These things are often big decisions made between a woman and her partner, or a mom and her baby. Instead, trust mom to make the right decisions for her family–she knows best after all.
Try: “You must be SO excited to hold your little one!”
“You better enjoy life while you still can!”
When a mama gets pregnant, she knows exactly what she will and won’t be sacrificing, and she’s made the decision to choose her baby above all. And it could be her life’s dream to be a mom. You just don’t know, so refrain from telling her about all she’ll be sacrificing.
Try: “You’re going to LOVE being a mama!”
“Was it planned?”
Talk about too personal! Whether this mom spent months trying to conceive with her partner or it happened after a romantic night together, it’s none of your business as an outsider. Just be happy for them–regardless of how it happened.
Try: “Congratulations!”
“It’s about time!”
Be careful crossing into sensitive territory with this one. You can’t possibly know a woman’s journey to motherhood–she might have spent months or even years trying to conceive, which can be an incredibly painful process. Don’t bring up painful memories by reminding her that she wasn’t pregnant years ago.
Try: Again, a simple “Congratulations!” goes a long way.
Hang in there, moms, there will always be nosy strangers, friends and family members, but that little one will make it all so worth it. And to those not pregnant, take heed and be kind–us pregnant mamas need all the support we can get!
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